263: Do You Struggle with Joy (Even Though You Know Christ)?
Last Updated on August 29, 2024 by Alicia Michelle
What keeps us from finding joy as Christians? If you’re struggling with finding joy in hard times despite being connected with God, join me today as I share 10 common reasons why you may be disconnected from godly joy (and what you can do about it).
Don’t forget to download my newest free resource “10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy” to help you learn practical tools for finding joy!
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN:
- [1:37] Announcement #1: New Site URL: AliciaMichelle.com now up!
- [03:49] Announcement #2: New Book: Emotional Confidence Releases Nov 12!
- [08:22] Announcement #3: New Free Video Training: “10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy”
- [12:04] Are You Secretly (or Not So Secretly) Mad At God?
- [14:50] Do You Feel Like You Are Always Searching For More?
- [16:03] Are You Holding Onto Bitterness or Anger?
- [18:14] Is There Something Holding You Back From Your Fullest Expression?
- [20:34] Isolation Affects Our Ability to Live Joyfully
- [21:59] Are You Paralyzed By Overthinking?
- [22:55] Are You Focused on Checking Boxes Instead of Checking in With Christ?
- [24:16] Are You Emotionally, Physically, or Spiritually Burnt Out?
- [25:42] Do You Know How to Process Your Emotions?
- [26:47] We Need to Build Habits + Mindsets That Make Us a Conduit for Godly Joy
[1:37] Announcement #1: New Site URL: AliciaMichelle.com now up!
I have a new URL where you can access all the podcast episodes, free training, courses and so much more. The new site is AliciaMichelle.com. And as part of this switch to the new URL we have been redoing the homepage, adding new sections and so much more! I encourage you to check it out!
[03:49] Announcement #2: New Book: Emotional Confidence Releases Nov 12!
If you struggle with managing your emotions you are going to love my book “Emotional Confidence: 3 Simple Steps to Manage Emotions with Science and Scripture.” It comes out November 12th but if you join the book launch team, you will get extra bonuses and you get to read the book early!
This book is for anyone who struggles with managing their emotions, both men and women. It is very practical and focused on a specific 3-step technique that I have taught to my coaching clients. It goes through a specific action plan of how to deal with those difficult or uncomfortable emotions that tend to come up and how to partner with God on how to work through them.
The book is based on brain science principles to show us how our emotions work while also combining the scriptural aspects of where is God in each phase of us managing our emotions. It helps us tackle five common emotions that we struggle with and even talks about different lifestyle habits or other things that can support healthy emotions.
When you are on the book launch team, you will receive a digital copy that will be sent to you on November 12th, along with other fun bonuses! It’s low stress to be on the launch team: We simply ask that you pre-order the book on Amazon, agree to write a review when the book is released, and share about the book as you feel led.
If you believe in this concept and you have been blessed by what we talk about here on the podcast, I would love your support in getting the word out by joining the launch team!
[08:22] Announcement #3: New Free Video Training: “10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy”
I have a brand new resource available called “10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy.” There are a lot of people who are believers and yet they feel like something is missing in their life and they are not able to fully rest in Christ’s joy. Galatians 5:22 says, “Joy is the fruit of the spirit” so we have to be connected to the spirit for that joy to be cultivated. We also need to put ourselves in a posture to be able to receive joy. If we can develop these habits and mindsets, we can let joy flow right through us.
We are always going to walk through uncomfortable situations or difficult things, and there is always a reason to not choose joy. But if we can set ourselves up with those habits and mindsets to plug into the root of joy – this is only going to make our lives sweeter. We will appreciate what we have and find more peace in our lives. I encourage you to enjoy this resource!
[12:04] Are You Secretly (or Not So Secretly) Mad At God?
There are 10 common reasons as to why we may be disconnected from joy.
The first reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are secretly (or not so secretly) mad at God. When I begin working with women in The Christian Mindset Makeover, we often find that this is what is happening. We discuss this in the process of shifting our thoughts on a subconscious level and we address what is inside our thoughts around our trust in God. This anger may have come from God “not coming through” in a certain situation or feeling like an answered prayer did not happen.
We may be left with all of these questions like “Why did you take my mom early? Why did you allow this child to suffer in this way?” I want to remind you that God is mysterious and if we are not careful, we can build a wall or create a crack in our foundation in Him. Those things hinder our ability to have joy in God. We end up building anger, resentment, bitterness, and disappointment – which all greatly affect our ability to connect with God.
[14:50] Do You Feel Like You Are Always Searching For More?
The second reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we believe that we are lacking or do not have enough. We are discontented with what is right now. We feel like we are always searching for more and this feeling does not allow us to rest. We cannot accept what is in front of us whether that is a limited budget or a child who is suffering. This makes it difficult to rest in joy because joy is a space of surrender and flow – not an emotion like happiness that has ebbs and flows.
[16:03] Are You Holding Onto Bitterness or Anger?
The third reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are angry or holding onto bitterness towards a person or situation. Even though I felt like I did not have a lot of bitterness or anger in my life, God has recently shown me some things that I have been holding onto that I need to let go of. This bitterness was focused on a certain person.
I have not thought about this because I have not seen or interacted with this person in a while. I did not realize that there was a weed growing bitterness inside of me. The Lord needed to press on this sore spot within me and if you know what I am talking about, you have felt this pressure to deal with it.
A couple of months ago, I went to a place nearby in nature with my journal and sat there with God and expelled a lot of the bitterness and anger that I felt. The freedom, confidence, boldness, and joy that has come from that feels brighter and I did not realize how holding onto that was affecting me. I encourage you to ask yourself, is there somebody that you are angry at or a situation that you have been harboring bitterness around? If so, this might be something that is hindering your joy.
[18:14] Is There Something Holding You Back From Your Fullest Expression?
The fourth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we do not feel safe to joyfully live in who God made us to be. We may feel that we are not able to set boundaries, have an opinion, or say no to someone. We are conditioned to follow and listen to what others have to say about us and unfortunately, this means that we are not free to express who we are in Christ.
We may be fine for a while but after time this drains us. We feel like we are forcing ourselves to find joy but there might just be a big block in the way that you need to get past. This block might keep you from living that full expression of who God made you to be. As a reminder, I am talking about this within the context of scripture – not full freedom of living in sin or a certain lifestyle. I encourage you to sit with God and ask yourself this question: “Do I feel like I am not safe to fully step into or leave behind a part of myself or a season that I need to move on from?”
[20:34] Isolation Affects Our Ability to Live Joyfully
The fifth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are isolated. In episode 238: “How Can I Feel More Connected + Less Lonely This Year?”, I shared a study from the US Surgeon General about the effects of loneliness in our culture. This study was a huge indicator as to how this is affecting our ability to show up mentally healthy. Although joy is a fruit of the spirit of connecting with God, if we are isolated, there is probably a good chance that we may not be thriving in all areas of our relationship with God either.
When we isolate, we tend to overthink and not hang out with people who may help us see God’s truth. This is why the Bible encourages us to meet and have fellowship with other believers. We are not alone in what we struggle with and when we isolate, it is easier for us to get in our heads and create those mental blocks that keep us from being able to access that joy.
[21:59] Are You Paralyzed By Overthinking?
The sixth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we feel like we cannot make a decision. We are overthinking and overanalyzing in an attempt to keep ourselves safe. This is something we are currently talking about in my group membership the Onward + Upward Collective. This month's topic is overthinking and many of us are not able to just rest in that flow of joy because we want to have the answers and cannot move forward until something specific happens. We keep spinning and waiting for God to give us the answer but this is what is blocking us from resting in who God is and His joy in our life.
[22:55] Are You Focused on Checking Boxes Instead of Checking in With Christ?
The seventh reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are checking boxes instead of checking in with Christ. Some of us may have drifted from that close relationship with Christ – maybe because of lifestyle changes or we are hiding in our hearts from stuff we do not want to deal with. If we are just going to church to check a box or we are not going at all because we are running from what is on the inside, it is really hard to experience joy.
Joy is the fruit of the spirit that is flowing in and we want those gifts but we also have to be willing to remove the clutter or junk that can get in the way. We might be checking boxes because we are angry at God, frustrated with where we are at in life, or mad at someone else. There are many reasons why, so we have to be open and honest with ourselves.
[24:16] Are You Emotionally, Physically, or Spiritually Burnt Out?
The eighth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are emotionally, spiritually, and/or physically exhausted. We need to notice the signs of burnout within ourselves and do something about them – not just for joy but for our health in general. Many of us have pushed ourselves beyond our limits and we are out of whack yet keep going because of responsibilities. We need to be able to find rest and rejuvenation.
I encourage you to check out these episodes if you feel like you cannot find joy because you are exhausted:
247: Avoiding Burnout: Finding Emotional + Mental Rest Despite Life’s Everyday Chaos
258: When You're a Human “Doing” Instead of a Human Being
259: Triggers + Responses: How Did You End Up Here?
260: Who’s the Gatekeeper of Your Thoughts?
261: So What Are You Going to Do About That?
[25:42] Do You Know How to Process Your Emotions?
The ninth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we do not know how to process our emotions. This is a huge block for us to receive joy.
Emotional confidence is a term I have defined as the ability to know what we are feeling and how to partner with God to walk through that feeling in a way that empowers us and grows our relationship with God. It is the ability to see it, not be afraid of it, and move confidently through it. I take you through a three-step process to move through these emotions in my upcoming book.
[26:47] We Need to Build Habits + Mindsets That Make Us a Conduit for Godly Joy
The tenth reason why many of us struggle to find joy is because we are not building in the regular habits and the regular mindsets that make us a conduit for godly joy. The free resource I talked about in the beginning, “10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy”, can help you with this.
We cannot manipulate ourselves into creating joy but we must put ourselves in a posture to be able to receive God’s joy. Those postures are built through specific habits and mindsets that are going to put us in a place to receive them.
RESOURCES:
Tired of up-and-down feelings stealing your peace, sabotaging your relationships, and filling your mind with self-defeating thoughts? If so, make sure to join the launch team for my new book, “Emotional Confidence: 3 Simple Steps to Manage Emotions with Science and Scripture”, coming November 12th!
Godly joy is a fruit of the spirit, but our physical, mental and spiritual states (things we’re in charge of) play a huge role in our ability to receive godly joy. Let me show you 10 practical ways to tap into everyday Christ-centered joy in my new free video training: 10 Habits and Mindsets to Cultivate Extraordinary Joy. Download it now!
Are you navigating new beginnings, creating new routines, or chasing divine dreams? If so, join us in the Onward + Upward Collective to gain the accountability, support, and encouragement (plus optional 1:1 coaching) you need to boldly pursue God's good plans.
RELATED EPISODES:
238: “How Can I Feel More Connected + Less Lonely This Year?”
247: Avoiding Burnout: Finding Emotional + Mental Rest Despite Life’s Everyday Chaos
258: When You're a Human “Doing” Instead of a Human Being
259: Triggers + Responses: How Did You End Up Here?
