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  1. Hi Anthony! Your Vibrant Family’s main readership is women, so we’ve written this post from a women’s perspective. However, yes, of course, these ideas would work for any gender.

  2. This is nice. However, if it says “spouse” why is everything for “him”? This advice is good for any gender…

  3. LOL! Yes, I guess it’s just the “making” part of the breakfast. 🙂 Perhaps it could be better written as “serve” breakfast in bed. No matter how you say it, I agree, it’s fun! 🙂 Thanks for sharing.

  4. When my husband and I had trouble connecting because of work schedules I found ways to let him know I love him and gave him reasons to want to see me. For instance I would leave a note in his vehicle that would say, “hey Baby, thank you for all your hard work. When we we get some time together, I’m going to give you a massage. ” it works he in time will make time and reciprocate the affection.

  5. Hi there, Raihana. I’m so sorry to hear that things are challenging in your marriage right now! I’ve found that my marriage is continually going through different seasons that require that my husband and I keep in constant contact about our feelings. For example, my husband is currently out of work and so that’s changed our day-to-day roles within our home. I would encourage you to share your thoughts with him about how much you miss him, and also to find ways to understand what he must be going through as well.

  6. I love what am reading nd am gonna use it.i have been trying things with my husband nd it’s not working.He’s been working late for the past week, it wasnt like that at first.now he has no time for me.he comes home late nd leaves early in the morning.i don’t know what to do or how to go about it anymore.please can u help me?

  7. I can’t read all of these now but I am so excited about this list. I was just writing about how my kids were saying, “Remember when…” and I realized that I have not been making any memories with any of my family, especially since baby #5 has come in the picture, and that includes time with my husband. I really like the idea of printing them out, cutting them up, putting them in a jar and then pulling out one at different times to do that week. I think I will do that! By any chance, have you done anything like this with things you can do with or for your kids? Thought I would ask and thank you again!

  8. Hi Steve,

    Thanks for your feedback. This post is written toward women because 95% of the readers of this blog are women, and this post’s intention is to help those women to discover creative ways to encourage and bless their husbands. A wife is called to actively show love to her husband, as a man is to actively show love to his wife. This is not a “pressure” but simply part of that calling to demonstrate love. The purpose of this post is to offer helpful ideas and inspiration for women to love their husbands well. Of course, should a man read this post he could glean ideas too, but if a man is looking for a specific post about how a husband should demonstrate love to his wife, then that might be better found on a blog that is written toward a male audience. Hope that provides some insight!

  9. Can we just take a moment to notice that these are all written in such a way that it appears women should be doing these things for men? Sure, men could take the list and replace ‘him’ with ‘her’, etc., but is this another way that our patriarchal, misogynistic society puts undue expectations and pressures on women to convince men that they are trustworthy and worthy of adoration? Is society asking men to do these same things for their wives/female partners? Is this another example of downplaying a woman’s value,/exaggerating a man’s value which is indoctrinated into the theology of many conservative Christians?

    …just asking questions….

    Sincerely, a Christian man

  10. I understand your concern, that neither partner should be co-erced into anything. Making love/having sex, or cleaning out the garage due to nagging/guilt. However the bible tells us we should not withhold sex from each other, except for a time of fasting. If the stereotypical “I have a headache”, is happening too often, maybe the woman/man should see a doctor about their libido. (And I’m mid-40’s, just so you know I’m not bringing a youth perspective) And there are seasons of life – with young children, where it’s easy to skip the importance of connecting w/ your spouse… But it’s so necessary to maintain the most important foundation of the family – the marriage. Blessings!

  11. Hi Stephanie! I understand what you’re saying. No one should have to have sex as “evidence” of their love. Agreed. I put it on the list because there are times when maybe we don’t feel into it and yet we know that our spouse would appreciate the connection. I’m not talking about it being forced or a “must do”. Thanks for helping identify that distinction.

  12. While I think that most of of these are loving and thoughtful, my only gripe would be that no one should ever have to make love or say yes to making love when they are tired as evidence of their love. I mean if the person doesn’t mind, go right ahead. This is not be a debbie downer but I think women often times feel as though they just should say yes to sex when they are not feeling good or tired as a testimony of their love, especially if their spouse persists. And that is not right. Again if someone genuinely wants to to because they love them and feel in mood, even tired. More power to them.

  13. “61) Write “I love you” in dry erase marker on his car rearview mirror.”
    That’s one of my favorites. I’m going to do it!!
    Thanks for this list.
    You are blessed.

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